Cassandra Rose

- Lady Gaga bought 55 Michael Jackson items at auction and plans to imbue their power.

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Despite being a coach on 'The Voice,' which makes amateur singers perform in a boxing ring while Cee Lo Green shows off his exotic animal collection, Adam Levine has gone on record saying it's actually Honey Boo Boo who carries the weight of society's downfall on her tiny little shoulders.

Damn. First she's blamed for car wrecks when she wasn't even there, and now this happens. Sister can't catch a break.

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As if being arrested (yet again) for punching psychics in the face wasn't enough tabloid fodder for Lindsay Lohan, the IRS has now seized all her bank accounts for an unpaid tax bill.

Thus giving "poor LiLo" a whole new meaning.

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Remember that time Playboy magnate Hugh Hefner was dating that young, attractive blonde?

No, not that one. Not that one either. Or that one. Or those two.

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Despite spending Halloween and Thanksgiving side-by-side, Chris Brown and Rihanna have continued to pretend everyone is too stupid to realize they're back together.

So maybe this picture of her straddling him is their official coming-out. On the plus side, at least she's wearing all her clothes this time.

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In the 25 seasons of 'Survivor' -- in which contestants are “stranded” on a desert island and tasked with competing in challenges, catching their own food, building their own shelters, not dying, and dealing with Jeff Probst -- a whole slew of medical professionals has toiled behind the scenes to make sure no one leaves in a body bag.

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Thanks to the mystical alien powers of Scientology, John Travolta can now heal the sick, raise the dead and fly. Or at least “cure” injured people of debilitating pain thanks to a special super secret technique called “an assist.”

Yeah, we know. Just smile and nod. It's safest that way.

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On-again-off-again-on-again (does it really matter anymore?) couple Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez were recently seen together having a romantic dinner, prompting Jelena fangirls everywhere to start planning their future wedding and photoshopping what their babies might look like.

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Seems Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale's marriage is fine, thanks, despite that perfectly-timed picture that made it seem like Rossdale was hands-on with more than just his kids.

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According to a recent report from the search engine Bing, Kim Kardashian has once again been named the "most searched person of the year," retaking her title back from the 2011 champ, Justin Bieber.

But first things first. People actually use Bing?

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Barbara Walters may have her generically boring 'Most Fascinating People' list for 2012, but to us, GQ's 'Least Influential People' list is a lot more interesting.

Favorites include failed presidential candidate Mitt Romney, vehicular danger Amanda Bynes, palate destroyer Guy Fieri, the hilariously titled "Whoever Directed John Carter," and perennial Oscar host Billy Crystal.

Congratulations, you're all utterly irrelevant.

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- Jared Leto shaved off his eyebrows to play a lady. Or a lady alien. We're not sure.

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