Madonna recently canceled the Australian leg of her MDNA tour, and now she’s offering her fans an extended explanation and apology.

Instead of writing a letter, Madge decided to record herself so that her disappointed Australian fanbase could hear her personally. The audio YouTube clip begins, “So I just want to say to all of my Australian fans that I am really and truly sorry to have disappointed you, and that’s something that I don’t feel very good about.”

It has been nearly 20 years since Madonna’s last tour Down Under, and while she had every intention of making stops in Australia she had to put her children first. “I know the last time I was on tour I missed Australia as well, and I can promise you in my heart of hearts that it was my intention to come again,” she explains. “But like the last time, my children are my first priority.”

Madonna went on to say that she would feel like an “irresponsible parent” if she didn’t stop her tour to spend time with her kids, especially with her 16-year-old daughter, Lourdes Leon, “leaving home soon.” She adds, “I feel really bad because I don’t take your support and your love for me for granted, I never do.”

The star ended her apology with a final plea. “Please forgive me and know that when I do come to Australia I will have made the wait worth your while and I will put on the greatest show on earth,” she says. “I haven’t forgotten about you and I hope that you can understand.”