Do You Feel All Alone? You’re Not!
This morning on social media, I saw a friend post a status saying, 'The person that looks out for everybody is always alone when they need somebody.' I'm here to tell you, you're not as alone as you think you are!
It took me a LONG time to learn this great fact of life... The reason we often feel unappreciated or alone when we need help is that we don't ask for help. It's really that simple. I know for the longest time I thought that my friends and family should be paying close enough attention to just KNOW I was in need, then I learned how to ask for help and life changed immediately for the better.
When you're used to being the strong one and the first one loved ones call when they need a shoulder to cry on, to lend an ear, or to borrow a truck and an extra set of hands to move, it's hard to admit you need help. Like really hard! As for folks not recognizing your pain, most people just aren't paying close enough attention even though they mean to. They're not being purposely neglectful, it's just that daily life and dramas distract everyone. After all, we are the center of our own universe. It's the only perspective we know.
My friend Alaina commented, 'when my grandpa died I was the one trying to comfort everyone else even though I was having the roughest time with it all and I was in such a dark place when my grandpa died I was the one trying to comfort everyone else even though I was having the roughest time with it all and I was in such a dark place.' I know we've all been there before. That's why, in my personal opinion, you should always take the time for self-care. You can't take care of your loved ones if you yourself aren't healthy yourself.
While this isn't expert advice backed up by a degree, I can promise you that I learned these truths personally through a lot of life experience. Love yourself, ask for help, and your 'people' will come through for you. If they don't, they're not your people.
Just promise me this, if these feelings ever persist, call someone. Call me! Or even better, call the professionals at the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. The line is open 24/7, free, and confidential. I lost a dear friend to suicide about a year and a half ago. No one knew anything was wrong because he didn't reach out. I never want to feel that kind of loss or guilt again.